
Chapter 12: The Loveliest Passion
~*~
'What is thy name?' He said, 'My name is
Love.'
Then straight the first did turn himself to me
And cried, 'He lieth, for his name is Shame,
But I am Love, and I was wont to be
Alone in this fair garden, till he came
Unasked by night; I am true Love, I fill
The hearts of boy and girl with mutual flame.'
Then sighing, said the other, 'Have thy will,
I am the love that dare not speak its name.'
Two Loves - Lord Alfred Douglas
~*~
A grogginess so thick and complete that it seemed
to strangle him
was weighing heavily over his eyes, clouding his mind. Harry fought it
blearily as something dragged his body from an unnatural sleep and out
of the warm suffocation that held him fast. His mind spun as he opened
his eyes and promptly closed them again, harsh lights piercing them.
Blinking owlishly, he stretched his aching muscles and allowed some
measure of clarity of mind to descend. Looking around at what appeared
to be walls built from dark stone, Harry sat up at once as a million
questions shot into his mind and the beginnings of a mild panic set in.
He had no idea where he was but immediately took stock of the situation
and realized with a jolt that he must be in the dungeons. The room was
large but dark, with the dazzling lights being nothing more than
torches burning merrily in their brackets. It was lined with wooden
cabinets and shelves containing all sorts of glass jars and bottles,
with coloured liquids and gelatinous substances brightening in hue as
they caught the flickering light. He himself was lying in a nondescript
bed with a chair beside it and a dark woollen blanket covering him.
Basic though it was, it reminded Harry a little of an old fashioned
sick-room and just as he was gazing around confusedly, he noticed the
other bed and its prone occupant.
Harry gave a start as he recognized a halo of
bright blond hair
fanned out across the pillow and the familiar contours of a body
stirring beneath an identical woollen blanket before the person in
question rolled over and blinked silently in what seemed to be mild
surprise.
"Draco?" Harry found himself saying, although his
voice was hoarse
with disuse and his vocal chords tight in his throat. The other boy
looked up at once and a light of recognition illuminated his face
before it began to look rather confused.
"Harry?" he said and Harry felt his heart skip a
beat. "Where are we?"
Harry shrugged. "I don't know," he said. It
struck him as strange
that he should be talking to Draco Malfoy in so familiar and friendly a
manner and that when he looked at Draco he was bombarded with feelings
that had nothing to do with animosity. Draco sat up and the blankets
fell away revealing a white t-shirt that rode up when he yawned and
stretched. Harry swallowed and felt a bit flushed. Draco regarded him
intently for a moment.
"I have this feeling that I should hate you," he
said, narrowing his grey eyes, "and I'm not entirely sure why I don't."
Harry felt a warm tug of relief in his chest that
he was not the
only one of the two rivals to be feeling positively sociable. "Me
neither," he said and managed a small smile. They lapsed into a
contented silence as they both gazed around the room and tried to take
in their surroundings. There was something companionable about the
situation and something that felt incredibly right in that they
were alone together and perfectly comfortable.
"Where are we?" Draco asked after a few moments,
rubbing his eyes.
"Not sure," said Harry, and he clambered
awkwardly out of bed and
grimaced as his bare feet hit the cold stone floor. He could almost
feel the weight of Draco's eyes on him and as he turned around he
caught the Slytherin looking at him with an expression that was new and
hungry and flirtatious all at once. Harry's mouth went very dry. "I
think," he said, tearing his eyes away from Draco with difficulty,
"that we're in one of the old Advanced Teaching rooms. I visited them
once or twice last year."
"Didn't know you were going in for Higher
Education," Draco said.
"Nah." Harry yawned again. "It's just the
inculcation of the incomprehensible into the ignorant--"
"By the incompetent," Draco finished and the pair
looked at each
other curiously as if trying to place something. There was a very
strange feeling passing over the both of them simultaneously, as though
they were having a long déjà vu, except it was hard to
place and as
though time was shifting forwards slightly. It was bizarre.
"How did you--?" Harry began.
Draco shrugged. "Something I heard once and
thought was cool."
"Yeah," Harry replied. "Me too, I think." He
turned back to his
examination of their quarters but snatches of memory seemed to be
slowly filtering back into his mind and then they hit him with such
force that his head exploded with pain and he sank to his knees on the
floor, clutching at his temples, his fingernails making small crescents
in his skin.
He saw a city washed in golden haze as the early sun
kissed the
silver domes and spires. It rose in a timeless arc over a growing
skyline and Harry watched it all from the edge of the roof, a glass of
orange juice in his hand, toasting the world and his good fortune.
He saw a crimson velvet curtain rising over a stage and
Draco's hand
covering his as they sat in the balcony. He watched as actors lost
themselves in Wildean paradoxes and Draco waxed lyrical for a good ten
minutes about the art of theatre.
He saw Hermione grinning at her husband. He was a man
Harry had
never seen before and yet recognized immediately. Hermione looked so
different, so much happier.
He saw Ron, older and stockier, his pale face wincing in
the sun.
Unchanged in all but appearance, Harry watched as his best friend
punched him on the arm before putting a glass of wine in his hand.
He saw Death Eaters pointing their wands at him, and a
snake
erupting from his fingertips. That image drowned itself in a pool of
someone else's blood and Harry felt an echo of an injury crack along
his skull as he was thrown backwards into a wall.
He saw Draco framed with moonlight as he leaned over and
kissed him.
He wanted to touch every inch of that skin and feel him arch with
pleasure.
He felt an overwhelming need to hold him and to tell
him...to tell him...
"I love you." The words had left his lips before
Harry had even
registered what he was saying and when he did so he looked shocked at
himself and felt wave upon wave of confusion breaking over the solidity
of that single fact. Draco, who had been similarly burying his head in
his hands as a barrage of parallel memories assaulted him, looked up
with a start. Something inside Harry's head was yelling reminders that
this was Draco Malfoy, long time enemy, Slytherin and a Death
Eater-in-training, but all that didn't seem to matter. What he could
remember above all else, were feelings, strong ones that veered as far
away from hatred as possible.
Draco's eyes clouded over for a moment as a
kernel of understanding
that he couldn't place seemed to lodge itself in the perpetuity of his
consciousness. "I--" he said. "I don't-- you shouldn't--" He sighed and
a gentle wash of acceptance and discernment diffused over his face. He
made a little head-cocking motion, which Harry interpreted as an
invitation to approach him. Mouth still smarting from what he had just
said, he kneeled on the end of Draco's bed and looked away, blushing
furiously. Draco was still for a second before he brought one finger up
to trace Harry's cheekbone, sending tingles the length of Harry's spine
and making his heart pound in his chest.
"No scars," Draco said, ruffling his hairline
above his ear where the skin was smooth and unmarked.
"Never had a scar there," Harry said, momentarily
puzzled.
"Someday you might," Draco replied mysteriously
and tilted Harry's
face towards him so they were nose to nose. Harry could feel Draco's
breath softly brushing over his skin and could see every plane and
angle of his face next to his, so close to him, so perfectly fashioned.
It was strange, though, not to see a lingering sense of haunting grey
tragedy settled in his astonishing eyes, which Harry somehow expected,
or the pale lines of care in his face that a new impression of youth
had wiped away. Draco looked so young and carefree and so peaceful next
to him, his eyes fixed on Harry's before moving to rest on his mouth,
Draco's own tongue moistening his lips with a quiet delicacy. From this
distance Harry could see every single mark on Draco's face, from the
pale freckles on the bridge of his nose to his eyelashes, which were
too dark for someone so fair. Harry shifted further towards him until
he could feel the heat from Draco's body warming him and they were
scant inches apart, beholding each other as if they had never done so
before.
And then their lips were brushing and Harry
teetered on the brink of absolutely everything.
Suddenly the door creaked and he and Draco jerked
apart as though scalded.
"You're awake." The voice was one laced with
surprise, a certain
oblique sarcasm and a definite note of disdain. Harry didn't need to
turn around to know that it was Snape, but he did so anyway. The door
was open and framed in the torchlight was their Potions Master, just as
they remembered him, imposing, sallow and forbidding.
Draco coughed. "Yes, Professor," he said,
climbing out of bed and
perching himself next to Harry. Snape came over to them at once and
began a methodical examination that involved spelling various
instruments to poke, prod and take readings whilst unnervingly airborne
around their bodies. With a clinical detachment he took their
temperatures, measured their heartbeats and after a lengthy interview
pronounced them to be in full possession of their minds, something he
declared to be 'very lucky indeed'.
"What happened?" Harry asked, shivering a little
in the dankness of the underground room.
"How much do you remember?" Snape asked in
clipped tones.
"Very little," Draco mumbled from around the
thermometer in his
mouth. "Seems a bit like a dream. Did we really travel through time or
did I make that up?"
Harry dropped his beaker of Pepper-Up potion as
he realized exactly
how he had ended up where he was and all the fragments of memory seemed
to fall into place. "We did!" he exclaimed. "We were in our futures,
only they were the present and this is the past, only it's not because
now it's the present."
"Very articulate, Potter," Draco said amusedly
and Harry nudged him
with his shoulder. If Snape found the exchange at all unusual then he
did not betray it.
"You have both been unconscious for nearly two
months," he said with
an edge of sternness. "In case one or both of you don't remember, you
added an incorrect key ingredient to your Pertho draught and then
proceeded to test it without my knowledge and without me checking it
first."
"Oh yeah," Draco said sheepishly, biting his lip.
"You do realize," Snape's voice grew colder, "the
monumental
stupidity of doing so? In adding the wrong rose petals, you completely
changed the potential of the potion and constructed something very
different." Harry's heart sank as he recognized that two months was a
hell of a long time for Snape to have to build up a suitable rant for
when they had recovered. He sighed resignedly.
"It wasn't our fault, Professor," Draco said with
a touch of annoyance. "The recipe we were working from was damaged--"
"And you didn't think of borrowing someone else's
to make sure you
were correct?" Snape fixed his favourite pupil with one of the patented
glares that he usually reserved for Harry, who privately thought that
his teacher was being unnecessarily harsh over an accident. "Let me
tell you, Mr. Malfoy, about all the trouble you've caused. Time didn't
stop passing just because you weren't here to occupy it, and you have
spent the better part of two months completely comatose. Not only have
the entire staff been worried sick for your welfare, but both your
families were informed and Dumbledore has had to work for days to keep
this from leaking to the press. Potter," Snape spat the word like it
was poison, "I'm sure you can imagine the uproar from your fans that
would result from their learning that you had been rendered completely
insensible."
"You wrote to my father?" Draco gulped and looked
pale.
"You wrote to the Dursleys?" Harry felt like
laughing at the futility of that. "What, did you think they'd actually care?"
Snape shot him enough of a glare to shut him up
quickly. Steam was
still delicately issuing out of his ears from the potion and making
Harry feel rather light-headed.
"If we've been comatose for so long," Draco said
with a sense of
defiance about him, "why are we here? Why haven't the St. Mungo's
healers been looking after us?"
"Because," Snape replied, clearly affronted, "I
am a more
accomplished master of potions than any of those healers and I, unlike
them, knew and understood exactly what had happened to you. The only
complications arose when you didn't wake up when you should have done,
that was when the staff began to worry and we were forced to begin
experimenting with treatments. The healers at the hospital were
consulted for advice but nothing more and I was bequeathed two
excellent test subjects for the subject of my latest medical paper. You
are both feeling alright, I trust?" Snape asked, finishing his
examination and taking the seat by the bed.
"A little tired," Draco replied, "but essentially
fine."
"Don't remember much," Harry muttered, trying to
sort through the
fog in his brain for any other detail before it was lost in the depths
of his subconscious.
"What do you remember?" Snape pressed.
"Um--" Draco blushed a little.
"Feelings, mostly," Harry ventured, trying hard
not to look at the Slytherin. "Emotions, that kind of thing."
"That's to be expected." Snape's voice was harsh
and tight whenever
he was forced to converse directly with Harry, a pastime he loathed.
"To have you recall the exact details of your future would put it at
risk. Your father has been here, Draco," he said, turning abruptly back
to him.
"So I gather."
"He wanted your removal to St. Mungo's at once
and it was only
Dumbledore's acknowledgement that you should not leave the Hogwarts
grounds that has kept you here," Snape said, evidently relieved at
being able to finally admonish them for their oversight. Draco looked
downcast and Harry was compelled to comfort him, wanting hazily to fold
him in his arms and kiss him on the lips whilst recognizing that at one
time such an idea would have seemed nauseating.
Mind wandering from Snape and Draco's
conversation, Harry stretched
his screaming muscles once more and tried to get them to loosen up
after being so still for so long. He was filled with restlessness and
as the last of the aching tiredness fell from his bones, he wanted
nothing more than to stand up and walk around. Unfortunately, when he
tried this, he felt so incredibly dizzy that he had to sit down again.
"For Merlin's sake, Potter." There was no note of
indulgence in
Snape's tone. "Just sit down. You have been through an arduous ordeal
and your body will need some time to recover." Harry sat down on
Draco's bed again and held his head, waiting for the dizziness to stop.
"I'll go and retrieve your robes," Snape went on. "Madam Pomfrey
insisted that you wear pyjamas when in bed. The woman was quite
adamant." With those words Snape walked out and through the blackness
of his closed eyes Harry heard his footsteps retreat. Then there was
silence.
"Are you alright?" Draco's voice was soft and
concerned. Harry
nodded as the shakiness seemed to wear off slightly. He jumped as he
felt cool, narrow hands brushing over his temples and lifting his chin,
and just as Harry opened his eyes, Draco placed a gentle kiss in the
middle of his forehead, utterly startling him.
"What was that for?" he asked.
Draco just shrugged appealingly and glanced down
at Harry's lips,
which Harry licked awkwardly and he became painfully aware of the
thundering silence that enveloped them. The fact that Snape had
unwittingly left them alone dawned on Harry and suddenly Draco was
leaning into him and catching their lips together and every experience
he had ever had of the Slytherin broke and remade itself in his mind.
The kiss was short but intense as Harry explored Draco's mouth and
threaded his hands through the dishevelled blond silk of his hair.
Time, so freely moving and significant, stopped for a few moments and
became irrelevant.
Draco pulled back first, breathing hard, his face
flushed and his
lips reddened. Harry thought he looked beautifully debauched and
couldn't resist reaching out his hands and pulling Draco to him until
they were skin to skin and their hearts were beating against each
other. The hug was awkward at first but then Draco loosened in his arms
and Harry began to kiss all his uncertainties away. Every time their
lips met, they overcame a little of their reservations until Harry
pushed Draco down on the bed and was swallowed up by the moment. He
paused, propped up on his elbows, Draco stretched out beneath him, a
flurry of golden hair, sardonic smirk and acres of pale, perfect skin.
"So beautiful," Harry murmured, almost to
himself, before nipping at Draco's lower lip and eliciting a little
sigh from him.
Harry would have been happy to stay there all
day, but at the same
time as he heard footsteps coming down the corridor, he saw Draco's
eyes widen and they rolled apart at once.
The sound of steps echoed down the hall outside,
accompanied by the
long peals of laughter that Harry dimly recognized as Ron. His heart
skipped in his chest at the sound as it seemed to recall him back from
somewhere far away, planting both of his feet on the ground and
bringing him sharply to the present and to reality. He had spent so
long focusing solely on Draco and the burgeoning feelings of desire
that had sprung from their forced companionship that everyone else had
been pushed out of his mind. Now, as the door swung open, three of his
very first friends stepped again into his house of excess.
Their reaction to seeing Harry awake was
priceless. Hermione dropped
the papers she was holding, Ron was cut off mid-laugh and Seamus's
mouth fell open comically.
"Hey guys," Harry said weakly, throat scratchy
and lips tingling. He
gave them a little wave before they exploded with noise and ran towards
him, arms and hands gripping him so tightly he didn't think they were
ever going to let go.
"You're awake!"
"When? How?!"
"We've been so worried!"
Harry pulled back with difficulty to survey them,
pieces of his
adolescence that seemed strangely distorted and out of place. He wanted
to picture Hermione's hair straighter and styled differently, he wanted
to see Seamus with a rounder face and redder cheeks and he felt that
Ron should have more of an air of exuberance about him. There was
something different about all three, as though they were mirror images
of themselves with just one aspect wildly changed.
"Oh Harry!" Hermione's eyes were shining with
tears. "We thought--
we thought--!" She broke off and flung her arms around him again, her
face against his shoulder and her hair tickling his nose. She smelt
sweet and Harry held her tightly, genuinely glad of her presence.
Untangling himself a moment later, he felt Ron slap him hard on the
back so that the breath was knocked out of him and he was assaulted
again by their stream of questions.
"How long've you been awake, mate?" Seamus asked
breathlessly, sitting on Harry's bed.
Harry glanced at Draco who had withdrawn
immediately into himself and was resting his chin on his knees. "Not
long," he said.
"We were so worried!" Hermione exclaimed. "Snape
hasn't been letting
us come and see you very often, but the whole school knows about it!
Everyone thought it was dark magic at first but then Snape told us
you'd just cocked up the potion."
"Were you in the future?" Ron asked excitedly.
"What did you see?"
"I can't remember all that much," Harry said
truthfully, rubbing his
tired eyes. "Not many details anyway. I can remember feelings, though,
and bits and pieces of memory. Just random stuff."
"What was it like?" Ron asked.
Harry could feel Draco watching him. "Good," he
said. "From what I can remember it was amazing."
"What are you looking at, Malfoy?" Ron said
suddenly and Harry's
heart sank. He looked quickly at Draco who had been watching him and
then at Ron who was standing protectively in front of Harry. Draco
looked Ron up and down with a deliberate slowness that made Ron's lip
curl and Harry's feeling of foreboding increase.
"Nothing of any worth," Draco said with a
distinct air of malice. Ron's ears went pink and his jaw tightened.
"Well you can just fuck off, then," he said in a
low voice. "All this was your fault anyway."
"My fault?!" Draco stood up so fast the bed shifted across
the flagstone floor. "How, Weasley? When I'm so much better at Potions
than anyone else in this room?"
"You'd do anything to hurt Harry," Ron said,
moving closer to Draco. "Anything to try and screw him over."
Draco raised one eyebrow and his lips formed the
smirk that told
Harry that a sexual innuendo was on the way and so he dived into the
middle of the pair. "Stop it!" he exclaimed. "Both of you!"
"Harry!" Ron exclaimed, affronted. "Let me deal
with the prat!"
"No." Harry rubbed his eyes. "Just give it a
rest, please." He sat
back down and felt the bed creak as Draco took a seat next to him. He
could see Ron fidget uneasily.
"Sorry," he said. "I know you've only just woken
up and everything." He shot Draco a dark look for good measure.
"Your robes." Snape had returned with several
swathes of black
draped over his arms. He laid them on the bed and with a casual flick
of his wand draw dark green silk curtains around the two beds,
enclosing the Gryffindors and Draco inside. "I see no reason why you
cannot get dressed, but I want neither of you to think of
leaving here without a large supply of Strengthening Potions. Do you
hear me?"
"Yes, Professor," they both said meekly. Snape
glared at Ron, Seamus
and Hermione suspiciously before whirling out again, no doubt to fetch
some foul concoction for them to drink at regular intervals.
"Oh Harry, it's been awful." Hermione said when
he had gone and
Harry and Draco were sorting through the regulation school uniforms
they had been handed. She had a tear track down one cheek and looked
quite beside herself. "No-one was sure if you'd ever find your way back
and wake up!"
"He was with me all this time, Hermione, of
course we were going to
find our way back," Draco said with no malice or exasperation. Harry
didn't notice anything particularly strange about his comment but the
spluttering of his friends reminded him that Draco had never in all his
days been pleasant to Hermione.
"Got sick of the insults, have we?" Ron asked
aggressively, striding
in front of Hermione as if to defend her. "What the hell is up with
you, Malfoy?"
"Oh bugger off, Weasley," Draco sighed, as if
just realizing that he had said something extraordinary and wanted to
mask it.
"What's that?" Seamus asked suddenly and bent to
pick something up off the floor.
"No thanks, I'm here visiting my friend,"
Ron retorted, standing next to Harry. "Not something you'd know much
about, is it?"
Draco had just opened his mouth to respond when
Seamus said in a
tight voice, "when you say you've been with Harry all this time, what
did you mean?"
Harry felt himself redden slightly and chanced a
look at Draco whose
composure had faltered for the briefest of moments before he
resurrected his veneer of superciliousness. "Why do you ask?" he said
as though bored with the conversation.
Seamus looked for a long time at Harry who found
it difficult to
maintain his gaze steadily. "Where did this come from?" he asked,
holding something towards them that looked suspiciously like a
photograph. Harry made to take it but Ron was quicker and snatched it
curiously out of Seamus's hand.
"What's this?" he asked and then froze as the
photograph registered.
"Harry?" His voice was as cold as ice. "What the fuck is going on?"
Draco grabbed the photograph and regarded it with
a fractional
lightening of his eyes and twitching of his mouth. It was the one Draco
had found at the flat, the one where they had both been sprawled on top
of each other at the beach, all over each other. "How the hell did this
get here?" he asked. Harry didn't answer, too busy trying to think of
something to explain the situation to Ron and the others.
"What the fuck is going on?" Ron asked again,
this time in a
slightly louder voice, one hand balled into a fist at his side. Harry
could cope with it if he chose to shout at him or if he was disgusted,
but the look of utter betrayal that flitted across his features was
more than he was prepared to deal with. Harry looked over at Draco who
was turning the picture over in his hands.
"It's from Hermione," he said. "Not you." He
looked up at the young
Hermione standing next to him. "Your future self. She must have spelled
it here as a reminder." Harry glanced at the picture, written on the
back in a neat script he recognized as similar to Hermione's present
one, he read:
I hope you find this and remember the good times.
Live your lives well.
Love,
Hermione and Remus.
"Reminder of what?" Seamus asked, looking from
Harry to Draco and back again. "Harry?"
Harry swallowed. "Draco and
I...um...are...well..." Ron looked faintly pale.
"A couple," Draco finished for him, glaring
defiantly at Ron.
For a split second there was total silence.
"Is this true?" Ron asked hoarsely. Harry nodded,
not knowing what
else to say. He wished Draco wasn't fixing Ron with that particular
gleam of triumph but it really couldn't be helped and when Draco
furtively slipped his hand in his, it gave him a flash of much needed
resolve.
"Yes," Harry said quietly.
"You and Malfoy?" Ron spluttered, apparently
unable to believe his eyes.
"Yes."
"You have got to be kidding me," he muttered,
completely disregarding Draco. "This is Malfoy, Harry, Malfoy."
"I know who he is, thank you," Harry replied
coldly.
"Then you know that he has made your life hell
for years," Ron
jabbed his finger at Draco's chest. "I don't see how you can get over
something like that."
Draco snorted. "Practice."
Ron looked disgusted. "How could you, Harry?" he
asked and Harry looked away from his eyes at once.
"Ron," he heard Hermione say warningly.
"How can you be so calm about this?" Seamus
whirled around and turned on Hermione.
"Because I knew about it," Hermione said quietly,
not meeting any of their eyes.
"You did?" Draco asked in surprise.
Hermione let out a sigh and rubbed her tired
eyes. "When I took the
potion," she said in a soft voice, "it was like watching television
right inside my head. I skipped about six years and when everything
cleared I was sitting on a park bench beside you, waiting for someone,
who turned out to be--" She motioned towards Draco who was watching her
with a pensive expression.
"You saw them?" Ron asked. "And you didn't tell
me?"
"How could I?" Hermione replied, shrugging. "When
I knew you'd react
like this." She looked down at her hands. "At least it gave me a couple
of weeks to come to terms with it, though."
Harry didn't know what to say, and by the
troubled look on Draco's
face, neither did he. Ron's face was a similar colour to his hair and
he looked as though he was fighting back a torrent of expletives that
could only begin to cover his distaste for this situation.
"We should get dressed," Draco said quickly,
seeing Ron open his
mouth. The redhead's face deepened in colour but he and Seamus were
dragged away by Hermione and it was not until the trio had left the
room that Harry and Draco heard the muffled but indignant explosion of
noise. When it had died down and disappeared down the corridor, they
looked at each other.
"Oh well." Draco shrugged. "They'll get over it."
Harry groaned and stood up, unbuttoning his
pyjamas and picking up
the shirt from the bed. Draco was watching him and as Harry took off
his pyjama top, Draco stood fluidly and slid his arms around his waist,
pressing their lips together and sending a prickle of excitement
running up Harry's arms. The impromptu display of affection set Harry's
heart beating quickly and he registered a mounting arousal as Draco
nipped and kissed at his lips, twining their arms together before
licking a path down his neck. Harry could feel all the muscles in the
other boy's back shifting beneath his hands and with little disruption
he divested him of his shirt and pushed him back against the wall, his
own perfect, blond enigma.
It felt like a thousand years had passed but the
same tingles of
delight, same excited shivers were coursing through them. The same
thousand years could pass in a moment and it wouldn't matter, because
as Draco shifted forwards against Harry's growing hardness, the
delicious heat that seared through Harry's body wiped every rational
thought from his mind. Harry's hand slid over Draco's arm, running over
his collarbones and then down his chest, feeling the skin beneath his
fingertips run like silk over the framework of bones that made Draco
who he was.
Without warning the curtains were flung briskly
open and they looked
up to see their Potions Master staring at them with the kind of
expression that one reserves for surprises of the most horrifying kind.
"Bugger," Draco said succinctly.
"Quite."
*~*~*~*~*~*
The castle twinkled with the distracted flicker
of candles as they
drifted through the air, lending their insubstantial light to the
constant, oracular gleam of the ghosts as they talked in hushed voice
through transparent lips. The gothic windows rose towards the vaulted
ceiling, the many panes of glass refracting the stars into twisted
shapes and patterns that seemed to conform to the idea that every
future written in the stars has the power to be changed by the
smallest, most mundane things. Above everything else, Hogwarts was
imbued with power.
The marble staircase was wide and imposing as it
swept across the
Entrance Hall and opened itself into the many branches that held the
memories of thousands of feet treading the same daily paths. As Harry
and Draco walked slowly up it, neither of them spoke. The delicate
clink of the vials of Revitalizing potions that Snape had supplied them
with issued from their pockets and their soft footsteps were all but
obscured by the unthinking chatter of the adjacent Great Hall, where
dinner was being served and the occupants were as raucous as ever. A
sense of nostalgia, heady and thick, weighed down upon them with
bittersweet tendrils invoking simultaneous feelings of both wistfulness
and elation. Draco felt as though he was back in a world where
everything was certain, where he had nothing to hide and he could
relax. It felt like taking that first breath of air after being
underwater for a very long time. They were home at last, but something
had changed, some fundamental aspect of themselves and of their lives.
Their futures would be different to as they had seen because their
pasts would be changed, but how that would affect their present,
neither of them could begin to guess. It was just one of a hundred
paradoxes that was inextricably worked into their lives, and it would
take a greater mind and inclination than theirs to decipher them
clearly. As it was, they were content to be young again but with the
knowledge they now possessed, the intimate knowledge of each other and
of the search for true peace of mind. Whatever was in store for them
would arrive without their knowing, and to fight it would only prove
futile.
"You seem different." Hermione had been alone in
the common room but
for several timid first and second years when both of them had
clambered through the portrait hole and sank in front of the fire.
Draco had followed Harry without a word and neither of them had
questioned the wisdom of this, having existed so closely together for
so long, their companionship was natural and easy.
"What do you mean?" Draco asked, watching the
embers glowing in the grate.
"I don't know," she said cautiously. Draco had
noticed her warming
towards him slightly as he had offered nothing but politeness but she
still spoke warily, as if expecting a swift return of the bratty
teenager she was so used to. "Older, I guess. Yes, you seem older, and
changed."
"We've seen a lot," Draco said darkly as blurry
memories of
Bellatrix Lestrange came flooding into his mind. He could still feel
the warm rush of blood as it flowed over his hands, and he shivered. It
was peculiar. It seemed that the more vivid and profound an experience,
the more it stuck in their minds until they had almost detailed
snapshots of memory concealed deep in the tangled web of emotions.
"I don't doubt that," Hermione replied, watching
Draco guardedly.
"I'm just saying that you both seem different." She shrugged. "It's
like you've lost some of your impulsiveness, Harry, or--" She struggled
with the words. "You both seem more--jaded."
Draco let out a short laugh. "We had that before
we left," he said
and yawned. "Not that six weeks of sleep wasn't mightily refreshing but
I could really do with a bit more. Bed would be where, Potter?"
Harry grinned at him and stood up, taking his
hand.
Hermione blushed a deep red before she turned to
them both. "Look, are you sure this is a good idea?" she asked.
Harry's brow furrowed. "Why do you ask?"
She looked doubtful. "I'm not sure how many
people are going to
react like Ron did," she sighed, "and everyone will want you to explain
what your future was like and what happened to you."
"Can we just explain in the morning?" Harry asked
and Hermione rolled her eyes,
"Fine," she said, holding her arms out to hug
Harry. "Goodnight." He
wrapped her in a brief embrace before Draco leaned over and pecked the
top of her head.
"'Night, Granger," he said quietly. Hermione's
face was a picture of
astonishment as they made their way up the staircase. Draco glanced
over his shoulder to see her staring at him open-mouthed, before he
wound his arms around Harry and lost himself in the boy's warmth.
When they reached the dormitory Harry wondered
fleetingly where Ron
had gone but all thoughts were driven from his mind as Draco leaned
into him and pressed a delicate kiss to the hollow where his throat met
his shoulder. It was the lightest touch of a butterfly's wings but it
awoke a primal craving that made Harry lift Draco's mouth to his and
plunder it with his tongue. Draco drove them both backwards until they
landed on the bed, where he slid up Harry's body until he was
straddling him, pinning his arms above his head and sinking onto his
lips again until they were kissing fiercely.
"Draco," Harry whispered through the breathless
kiss, "there's something you should know."
"What?" Draco murmured back, biting Harry's lip
gently and licking a path down his throat.
"This is Ron's bed." The kisses stopped abruptly
and Draco jumped off the bed quickly, and shuddered.
"The Weasel's bed?" He looked
disbelieving. "That is beyond
wrong!" Harry got up too and pulled Draco through the crimson hangings
of his own bed, where he muttered a silencing spell and made sure the
curtains were tightly closed.
"No privacy here," he grumbled.
"Things are going to be different now, aren't
they?" Draco said,
looking around at the curtains, all that separated them from the rest
of the dorm.
"More interesting," Harry said, shutting Draco up
by pulling him
down on top of him. The alignment between their bodies was different
now. They were more equal in terms of breadth, and found tiny
differences in the way in which they fitted together. Harry had fewer
pale, white scars and Draco had lost a melancholy weight under which he
had seemed to bow. They kissed softly for a few minutes in the
darkness, their mouths finding each other and exchanging sensations
without the need for words.
*~*~*~*~*~*
Harry awoke the next day to find one arm slung
casually over his
chest and a warm body monopolizing most of his bed. Draco was lying
half sprawled across Harry, his chin resting lightly on his shoulder,
their faces separated by the merest breath. Harry didn't know if he had
ever fully appreciated Draco's lips before; they were a muted pink and
as full as a girl's. He smiled slightly as he remembered what that warm
mouth had been doing last night and pressed a gentle kiss to them to
rouse Draco from sleep.
"Whayoudoin?" Draco murmured groggily, not
bothering to open his eyes.
"What does it look like, ponce?" Harry said,
grinning as he managed
to make Draco's eyes fly open. He was rewarded with a savage bite to
the lip, which wasn't altogether a bad way to start the morning. Draco
stretched and coiled himself deeper into the tunnel of warmth inside
the bed, curling against Harry's body so that the different hues of
their skin blended seamlessly together. Harry worked his way through
the barriers of pointed elbows and long arms that Draco had thrown over
face until he found his lips again and gently brought him to
wakefulness.
They spent long minutes kissing in the darkness
of the bed, a lone
island of privacy that was not subject to the rules and expectations of
anything that might occur outside. Time moved by heartbeat. Their hands
passed over each other's bodies, palms roughened by years of Quidditch
exciting the skin they brushed until both were alive with the
possibilities of each other.
"We should probably get up," Harry murmured a few
minutes later. "I don't think we've got time for...you know."
Draco looked faintly disappointed, but nodded
sleepily. "You go
first," he said. "Come and get me when everyone's gone." He closed his
eyes again and Harry couldn't resist kissing him messily on the
forehead and eliciting a little 'mmf' noise from a mouth muffled by a
pillow.
He had hoped that he would be the first awake but
unfortunately he
had forgotten the Silencing Spell. The first thing he heard when he
stuck his head through the gap in the hangings was his name being
called at a ridiculously high volume for so early in the morning.
"Harry!" It was Dean, standing with his wand in
his hand and
apparently trying to charm the wrinkles out of a pair of trousers. On
seeing Harry he dropped both on the bed and gave his friend a brief
hug. "Seamus said you were awake but that you were still down with
Snape! Are you ok? How are you feeling?" Dean's excited face looked as
out of place as Ron and Hermione had the evening before. Harry still
kept trying to place his friends somewhere else, as though they didn't
belong here, in his mind anyway.
"Good, thanks Dean," he said, rubbing his eyes.
"Thought I'd skip
dinner and come straight to bed, I didn't think I could deal with
everyone's questions." Dean nodded amicably. "I'm fine, though."
"Everyone's been so worried!" he said, dragging Harry to sit next
to him on his bed. "Dumbledore and Snape have been working for weeks
on bringing you back! The Daily Prophet would have had a field day if
they'd found out. Lucius Malfoy kicked up a stink, of course, but there
was nothing anyone could do." Harry grinned as Dean prattled on,
watching as his face lit up excitedly. He barely noticed when a door to
his left slipped open and a familiar figure came into the dormitory
from the bathroom.
"Harry." It was Ron, a stony expression on his
face that was not
quite quick enough to mask a flash of surprise at seeing Harry there.
There was a definite coldness in his voice and he froze in the doorway,
wariness etched into his stance, eyes narrowed.
"Ron," Harry said, his voice suddenly very
hoarse. He didn't know
what to say to make this any easier, a palpable awkwardness filling the
space between them and making Dean at once uneasy.
"Er...is everything ok?" he asked, looking
between the pair of them
after neither of them spoke. Harry looked away from Ron's eyes, not
quite wanting to meet them.
"What are you--" Ron began guardedly and then his
eyes widened and he looked around at the room. "He's
not here...is he?" he asked and Harry's heart sank. He was unable to
resist glancing towards his bed where the innocuous crimson hangings
concealed the person Ron most dreaded to see.
"Who?" Dean looked confused. "Guys? Who's not
here?" he asked.
Harry stood up. "Look, Ron, I know this is hard
for you, but--"
"Hard for me?" Ron repeated, the colour rising in
his face again.
"You have no idea what it's like! And to have to find out from that
bloody photograph! You should have told me. Hermione should
have told me." He looked more upset than anything but the curl of his
lip and his refusal to come anywhere near Harry spoke volumes.
"Told you what?" Dean stood up too.
Harry felt instantly protective of Hermione.
"Don't start on her, what was she supposed to say?"
"I've been tearing my hair out over you," Ron
said, dragging a hand
through his hair and making it stick up in all directions. "worrying if
you were ever going to wake up or not, and as soon as you do, I find
out this!" He looked angry and upset.
"What?!" Dean seemed more confused than
ever.
"Tearing your hair out, Weasley? I'd have done a
better job of it,
there's still plenty of that hideous colour left." Harry's heart sank
still further, settling to somewhere around his navel. Draco had
wandered out of Harry's bed and stood before them, shirtless and
stretching, the glints of bullion from the sunlight dancing over his
skin. His face was devoid of its trademark smirk and he looked somehow
every inch the archetypal, calculating Slytherin.
"What on earth is he doing here?" Dean asked.
"Harry?"
"Fuck off, Malfoy," Ron spat venomously, "you
pathetic Slytherin creep."
Draco looked highly entertained by this. "Temper
temper, Weasley!"
he exclaimed, leaning back against the poles of the four poster bed and
folding his arms to his chest. Ron fixed Draco with a lingering look of
loathing and whirled around to face Harry.
"Harry, how could you?" he exclaimed, clenching
his fists. "How
could you bring him here? You just don't give a damn about any of us,
do you?" He looked so dismayed that Harry couldn't help feeling a
twinge of regret, layered deeply beneath his own anger.
"Ron, that's not fair!" he cried, but Ron was
already storming out
of the dormitory, slamming the heavy door behind him emphatically.
"Ron!"
Dean's voice was small and cautious and he kept
shooting Draco
suspicious looks. "Is someone going to explain what's going on?" he
asked.
"I'm going back to bed," Draco announced to
Harry, Dean and the newly awoken Seamus and Neville. "Joining me,
Potter?"
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